“He’s a baby gay,” Caleb declared, introducing a newcomer from his Sichuan hometown to a group of friends on a night out in Thailand’s southern island of Phuket.

In a darkened corner of ZAG Club, shrouded in roving blue beams of light and booming dance music, the group debated which men on the catwalk most struck their fancy.

Caleb’s friend shyly pointed to a man in white underwear with a striking smile. When they succeed at waving him over, Caleb poured the man a shot of whiskey. “Can you speak Chinese?” Caleb asked. “Yi diandian,” replied the man, smiling—just a little.

After a stunted attempt at conversation, Caleb’s friend took a consolatory gulp of his drink and told TWOC that he’s just over 30, and requested anonymity, as he is married back in China. “I did it for my family,” he explained, nodding to intense pressures in China to fulfill one’s filial duty by marrying and having kids, especially in the generation of single children.

“My wife and I have no sex life, except when we had my son. He’s 6 now,” he said. “I tell them I’m going on vacation with friends. I’ve been to ZAG many times.”

Thailand’s openness to sexual orientation and gender identity, especially in its cities and tourist-saturated islands, draws a growing number of LGBT Chinese in search of a place to explore their sexuality, hold hands in public, and receive gender-affirming medical care.

One of few countries in Asia to have signed the UN declaration on LGBT rights, Thailand has a comprehensive anti-discrimination law covering sexual orientation and gender identity, one of many legal protections that Chinese advocates are still fighting for. A bill that legalizes same-sex partnerships will be debated in parliament in the coming months.

While the country has a way to go on many fronts—including full LGBT marriage rights, and the right to change one’s gender on legal documents—it has sought to position itself as a “gay paradise” in efforts to grow its tourist economy.